Day breaks, vitamins in
I wake
Vitamin B12
6:30 AM
Vitamin C
7:00 AM
Combing hair and brushing teeth
7:30 AM
Drive to work, 55 the whole way, no more no less
Mutter under my breath
“What a world”
Vitamins keep us alive
I’m in need of a push
Vitamins in
It’ll work out fine
I’ll just need to start
breathing in
this goddamned oxygen
No longer human you’ll see
Peer into my
cold gray eyes
The vitamins controlling me
doing their best,
at least for a while
Day breaks, vitamins in
Looming over me
Vitamin D
6:30 AM
Clean the gashes all over my skin
7:00 AM
Vitamins B1 through 9
7:30 AM
Car stalls, left screaming, my temperament maligned
So full of contempt
For myself, surroundings, whomever is left
I’m in need of a push
One small step
To leave myself resigned
I’ll just need to stop
breathing in
this goddamned oxygen
It’s not living you’ll see
But what else?
Because it sure ain’t dying
It’s just one of those days
One of those months
Embrace the decline
God blessed your struggle
Tears rolling down your cheeks
Illuminated to an audience of thousands
Your sadness made you pure
It made you feel righteous
It made all that pain worthwhile
My struggle made me wicked
It made me the worst man that I’ll ever know
I’ve scorned all those still foolish enough to heed my wretched voice
God had no such charms for me
Only the virtues of cowardice, bitterness, malevolence, amongst a dozen other certain evils
My frustrations built a cage up and around my soul
And the key dangling over me all of this time
Is to trample on others like you
But this is all an astounding fiction, This is not my blood splattered against the bathroom wall, nor shower, nor tile floor, nor whatever’s left, that simply was but is no longer me
I’m a moral litmus test
I’m beyond normal
Because these are only the thoughts I entertain, the thoughts of the normal
No passion
No words
No future or past
I can’t talk my way out of this one
I have no recourse for that
I’ll end today’s session with a few more parting words
What’s a man to do when regret and unkindness is your life’s only work?
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